Creating Boundaries: The Value Of the Silent Button

Creating Boundaries: The Value Of the Silent Button

Over the years, I've learned a great deal about boundary setting and the importance of how our environments influence our mood and productivity. Anyone who knows me personally knows that I hate telephones!  As in, more than probably anyone you've ever heard say that they hate telephones. Something about them have signaled trouble for me since 7th grade when I got caught talking about someone on a 3-way call. At technology's first sight, I tossed in person communication for a good old text message. Fight me...

Sure, something about almost getting your butt kicked makes for a life altering philosophy change, but there is something to be said about a ringing phone. I used to make excuses for not answering the phone and would tell folk I’m trying to get better at communicating. But now that I’m a woman of a certain age with a diminishing filter, I embrace it as boundary setting. 

As  someone recovering from superwoman syndrome, a business owner, mom, wife, etc., rushing to answer a ringing phone usually means my life matters are being placed on the back burner for whomever just called. In the past, it meant me giving that person’s problems, issues or needs temporary priority over what I was doing (possibly planned, needed or productive) in that moment. Even worse - I often stopped productivity for something they could've send in text, to talk about someone’s IG post, an ex’s new girl or how much they didn't like someone. Boil...

A ringing phone is like an unexpected visit from a friend. Sure, you love them, but you would much rather welcome them at a time you're prepared to do so. Allowing unexpected interruptions  on a regular basis can lead to a bunch of well advised friends and family, fully vented out frustrations and complaints or even some well gossiped about folk. A phone can suck the life out your plans when you spend the rest of your day pouting cause your friend is upset about her ex’s last IG post with his new girl, and you don’t know what to do to help her. Then the post office closes before you mailed that contract off and the deadline is tomorrow. Let's just say I’ve been there...

To help me be a better friend - first to myself, then to others (smile), I learned that the silent button was my best friend. It allows me to prioritize my plans first, then make dedicated time to chat with my friends later. 

 What are some things you do for boundary setting?


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